Friday, September 7, 2012

Easy-Peasy (mostly)

Home and comfy. No awful staples running Frankenstein-like around my neck and I'm only on Tylenol.

Operation went well. Many handsome interns & students lurking around ~ just sayin'. The lovely pedicure I gave myself was wasted, due to having to don a pair of beige booties. Got a pair of my very own hospital issued Big Girl Panties... Bring it!

Here's my Anesthesiologist, Mark Caruso, who I wanted to make good friends with because he was going to make sure I was deep in dream-land when this all went down. I quickly drew a Happy Face, with a neck with dotted lines & scissors showing where to cut & "Have A Nice Day... Please!" written on it and left it lying on my chest as they wheeled me in to surgery. I want people to be happy when they are cuttin' on me.
Mark did a good job, as I don't remember a thing. He needs to work on his "Goin' Under" shtick though. He had nothing! I said, "Do I need to start counting back from 100 now?" And that's all I remember for about 5 hours as a whole group partied around my neck. I just hope nobody dropped a Junior Mint in there. They took out all the lymph nodes in the left side of my neck. I can just picture those little old nodes, sloshing about in a beaker somewhere. Self-disappearing stitches & steri-strips (white tape) & I'm done the first stage.

Here's my surgeons, who were really nice ~ no God-Complex attitudes in evidence.
 Dr. O'Malley
and Dr. Weinstein

Here's my Before & After pics:

Before


After


 Hee-hee, okay, here's the real after:
It's still swollen, but isn't scary at all. Squeamish me could even look at it. I screwed my diamond earrings back in and am ready for the next step.

The only bad thing was that I found out I'm allergic to morphine. No opium dens for me, kiddos. That was The Worst feeling. Imagine your worst headaches & nausea. (Elisabeth, I thought of you many times). A few more hurls and they deduced I was allergic to morphine. My room mate was a lovely older woman who was operated on earlier in the day and as I hurled into my puke bucket, she shouted "NURSE! NURSE!" for me. Thanks, Elaine ~ love ya. The poor woman had to hear my moans and feeble weeping all night, punctuated by hurling noises. My only complaint: The nurses didn't/couldn't figure it out sooner & didn't/couldn't give me anything else. It wasn't my neck that was hurting ~ just the worst headache I ever had ~ even compared to my one & only experiment with Tequila shots many years ago. Saving grace came in the form of my morning shift nurse, Maria, who brought me crackers, ginger ale &... Percocet:) Within 25 minutes, I could have wept with relief, as the headache faded.


Next is transoral robotic surgery, or TORS. O'Malley & Weinstein are the inventors of this procedure and have gotten may accolades for this technique. No external cuts ~ it's all done through the mouth. I just wish I had a bigger mouth. If Carly Simon & The Cookie Monster had a love child ~ that big.

The more I do this surgery stuff, the less it worries me ~ must be all my friends and family praying & thinking of me. Thanks so much! I go between weeping and laughing as I read your comments & emails. It's all Good Medicine, friends:)



22 comments:

  1. Susan-you continue to amaze me and keep me in stitches. So glad everything went well. Love the panties ! Michelle B.

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    1. Well, I'm comforted that I'm not the only one in stitches after all :)

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  2. Sorry, girlfriend, I missed this somewhere or I would have been in contact more. Glad things are going well. Love the attitude and love you!
    Hugs!
    Sistah Pat

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    1. No prob. Good to hear from you, Sistah:)

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  3. You know I had to ask for those anti-VS gotchies, they had me going commando.
    I said, oh no I'm always wearin' when I get the legal roofie...

    (I love junior mints (whoops!).)

    You know, the incision is on a neck fold- and since it's just on one side, I hope you're not lopsided-ly firm! Feel better soon! We need you...

    Lisa
    Nerve blocks Rock!

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    1. Lisa, I got to sport Big Girl Panties because ~ annoyances of annoyances ~ I got my period in addition to all the other fun going on ~ can I get a "Yay"?

      And WHAT neck folds:) heh-heh

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    2. How about a Hell-Yah... your scene is like a flashback... I hope the night is easy for you...

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  4. But did the cats peep on the carpet? you cant leave us hanging!!!

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    1. See text I sent you. He gets a pass because it was disguised in the cat bed pattern.

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  5. Get better gurlfried.. As soon as your done feeling like you been bitch slapped, me and sue will be down for a little visit... Maybe we could stop in to see Billy, and check on Eva....

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  6. El, for cryin' out loud, if I knew all's it took to get you down here was a bit of tonsil cancer, I wouldn't have quit smoking over a year ago.

    Billy... yes... and Eva. They bear checking on...

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    1. Smoke em if ya got um...
      JK.... : )

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  7. Thanks for including me on this blog since I would get nothing through our boys! I am so glad they didn't take your sense of humor with those nasty lymph nodes! You are truly amazing! And your positive energy must have reached yor son...heard he had the best round for the team while you were getting your "neck lift"! Hope you are feelin better. I will cover for you and walk with the golfers Saturday, but I look forward to going with you as soon as we can get out there together! We will keep you in our prayers too!

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    1. Hope I don't have to keep getting cut for son to score well in golf, for cryin' out loud!

      Look forward to strolling the course with you ~ hopefully real soon.

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  8. Yeah, how 'bout that Kim!
    I'll be expecting another low score from him during my next visit to HUPenn.

    Can't wait to be out watching the golfers & swatting away the gnats:)

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  9. Susan -

    Thanks for including us DC folks. I let the redhead know and even read your blogs to her. She laughed out loud at your musings on getting a 2 for 1 neck lift deal. Sorry to hear about the morphine - the nurses should have been more on top of that. Pain sucks! I may be heading to West Chester in Oct. Like Ellie said above if you're done feeling like you've been run over by a truck maybe I can stop in for a visit. Many thoughts and prayers are with you. Take care of yourself!

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    1. Love dat Red Head:)
      Thanks, darlin', for your thoughts & prayers.

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  10. Susan,
    I really had no idea how very funny you are!! Your posts are so amusing, even when feeling your worst. ( BTW, very scary that no one caught on sooner to your reaction to the morphine!) Your sense of humor is an awesome talent and gift. I wish you all the best and offer up my prayers for your next surgery. Love the note you left for your "happy gas" doctor! Keep 'em laughing, not too hard though. You don't want them dropping any Junior Mints anywhere. Gotta love that Seinfeld episode.
    xo..Missy O'Keefe

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    1. Come on now, Missy! I've always had this sparkling wit:)

      Thanks for your prayers & well-wishes!

      xxx's

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  11. Hi Suzie Q--Sounds like you are doing just fine! Great to have good docs. Been a little out of it in response and checking in on you. Alot of stuff happening on my end. Maybe I can stop by and visit...let me know if you are up for one. Is this Phil's last year at Hill? Sounds like he'll be getting his name on that wall with Michael as school champion!
    I miss my days at Hill...Michael graduates next June and BTW he was offered a job when he graduates where he interned this summer. KBW ( Keefe Bruyette & Woods) investment banking firm in NYC. Never woulda thought of my son as a big city boy! So happy that your spirits are as high as ever. Keep up the good work--Joan

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    1. Hi Joan-E!

      Yup, doing peachy, thank you. Hope things are going well on your end too. I know those twins of yours are keeping you busy. Congratulations to Michael for having a job lined up in his career of choice! How many can say that in this current environment? I think Phil will choose The City too, as he wants to be in the middle of all the action! Phil is a junior this year. He is also driving & you know how that makes for never seeing the boy! He just dropped his golf handicap to 8 ~ I'm so proud of him, & look forward to trailing behind the golf team soon, dodging behind trees & bushes.

      For now, I'm a big fan of email communication, as my voice gets squeaky. Plus, emails can't see the swirling helixes of pet hair...

      oxox!

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